Is Judging Killing Your Business?
Judgment is very stealthy. It actually seems to be in the air we breathe and the water we drink.
It’s everywhere – judging ourselves, judging others, judging our accomplishments, judging our body. It really does go on and on forever.
Watch the video or read the article below to learn how you may be judging yourself without even knowing and what to do to turn it around.
The Problem with Judging
Here’s the problem with all this judging: we think that judging is a way to get better.
Judging is actually a powerful way to stop ourselves.
Through judging, we keep ourselves separate from what we truly want. We think we have to do better, we’re not enough, everyone else is better than we are.
Judging takes us out of the present moment, into our mind, into the past, into the future – anywhere but just right here. And right here, right now is where your power to create exists.
An Example of Judging – It’s sneaky!
I’ll give you an example from my experience recently.
I’m hosting a two-day Authentic Marketing event in Durham October 19 and 20th.
I’ve been working to enroll people to come. I am delighted with the people who are coming. I'm excited to spend two days with them helping them craft their message, so that it’s clear and compelling, and draws the right people to them – and that they can deliver it confidently.
Along the way, I’ve been judging myself.
I say to myself,
· “Oh, I haven’t done enough calls”
· “I haven’t sent enough emails”
· “I haven’t done enough attraction exercises”
It’s just rampant. I mean, everywhere I turn, I can be judging myself.
Then I asked myself, “Okay, but what am I missing?”
“What am I not looking at?”
What I'm not looking at is what has already happened. People have registered and paid to be in the workshop. They are doing their prep work and making plans to be there in person – some from a distance away.
I have not done this alone. The people who have registered heard what I had to say and signed up because they saw value in attending.
My assistants have helped me manage the details of getting the word out and people enrolled in the program.
My friends and colleagues have helped me spread the word and have encouraged me.
My coaches coached me.
It’s not the first event I’ve hosted, but it’s the first event I’ve done this way. I used to teach back in the day, and it’s been a while. I kind of know what to expect, but that was before social media and emails and all that stuff.
This is a dream come true. I have been dreaming of hosting events like this for 20 years. I'm very, very happy – but I was missing all that while I was judging myself and my efforts.
And the event hasn’t even happened yet!
An antidote to judging
An antidote to judging is appreciation.
The word appreciate asks, “What do I prize?”
“What do you value?”
“What do you pay attention to?”
Appreciation is a gratitude practice.
Maybe it’s just me but appreciation seems bigger to me than gratitude.
Appreciation seems ore all encompassing, more in the present moment, more inclusive of everything that is happening.
When I appreciate I say to myself,
“I see the whole picture.”
“I am right in the middle of it.”
“I am in the present moment, and I am appreciating everything I’ve done and everything other people have done.”
“I'm appreciating the opportunity that this is for me to be with these people and to deliver what I know to them.”
Your assignment for today, should you choose to take it on, is this:
Look around and see what you could appreciate about yourself, about another person, about what you’re creating.
What can you appreciate? Right here, right now.
That’s it for this week. I’ll be back with more inspiration to encourage your abundance!
P.S. I still have a couple of seats available for the Choosing Abundance: 2-Day Authentic Marketing Retreat in Durham, NC October 19th & 20th.
If you are interested in joining other service-based business women who are getting clear and confident about how they talk about their work, go here to learn more.
I’d love to have you there!