Compassion or Companionship?

Compassion or Companionship?

Do you ever feel a conflict about going for more abundance when others around you are struggling?

Do you wonder whether your doing well hurts others – that you should just keep struggling too?

Here are my thoughts on these questions along with an Energy Clearing and Infusion of thoughts and beliefs that may prove more beneficial for your doing well in your business and having more to share with others.

Watch the video to get the benefit of the Energy Clearing and Infusion or read the article below.

“Compassion or Companionship?: How to Deal with Your Feelings About People Who Are Struggling When You’re Going for More Abundance”

Hi, it’s Adele Michal. I work with women in business to earn more, serve more, and have more fun – in ways that are real and respectful for them and for others.

Yesterday, we had a wonderful Abundance with Adele workshop, talking about Deserving More. I really appreciate everyone who came out and participated – especially the person who asked, “You know, Adele, this is all great: going for more abundance, wanting to grow our businesses. But what about those people who are struggling? What about those people who don’t have as much as I do?”

And it’s a question I’ve asked, and it’s one that I continue to wrestle with: that guilt of, “Well, I'm doing pretty good. But what about those people who aren’t?” So I’d like to give you some thoughts about that – and do a clearing towards the end, so that, if that’s something that’s kind of jamming you up, you can see your way clear through that.

Is Struggle Helpful?

So the first thing I want to ask is, “In what ways does your struggling help other people?” If you’re struggling, how does that help another person?

Another way to ask that is: “Can you get sick enough to heal another person?”

I think not. I’ve been a healer for a long time. I’ve also had my own health challenges. And I know that when I'm feeling good and feeling energized, I am a much better healer – because I have more energy to work with.

I think the same is with money: If you are filled up, if you know your bills are paid, and your have surplus, then you can use that surplus of money or time or energy to help another person. So that’s the first thing. It’s really not possible, in my opinion, to help another person by getting in the muck with them.

I used to be a therapist. I’ve seen a lot of people with a lot of problems. And if I tried to get into the muck with them, we both were drowning. If I could get back up on the shore and say, “Here, here’s a live preserver. Grab onto it and let me pull you in,” that was a much better way to go.

The other thing is that, if you’re doing well, you serve as an example for others. And I cannot tell you how many people have said to me, “I did not know I could do x, y, or z until I saw her do it or him do it. And now I know it’s possible, so I can do it.”

If you’re doing well, you are an example to others. And you can help them in that way. So I think it’s a worthy goal to be full and abundant, so that you can help others more.

Choosing to Change is Not Your Choice, It’s the Other Person’s

The second thing I want to say – and of course, I’ve learned this the hard way as well and maybe you have, too – is that you can’t change anybody else.

You cannot change anyone else.

It’s a rule. It’s a law. It’s the truth. If you think about the changes you’ve made in your life, did somebody else make you do them? No. They may have suggested it, but you did it yourself.

It’s the same for everyone. So if someone’s not ready for help, they won’t be able to receive it. That’s another reason to be full and abundant – and be ready to help those that want your help, are ready for your help, and can use it. So that’s the second point I want to make.

Money Can Help

And the third point is that money helps. Money helps. We can give our love. We can give our caring. We can give our time. And at some point, money helps.

Money builds hospital wings. Money funds soup kitchens and women’s shelters. Money funds political campaigns.

You may not know this, but to run for a state house office – in this state, in North Carolina – it costs about $250,000: a quarter of a million dollars. So not only does the candidate have to campaign and get votes, she has to get money. So if you have a political candidate that you would like to back, your money would help that campaign a lot.

So that’s what I wanted to say about all that. My points are

1 - You can choose not to struggle, and you can choose to succeed, so you can turn around and help other people do the same.

2 - You can offer help when it is asked for.

3 - And you can give what you can of your time, money, and energy to honor yourself – and to honor others.

Energy Clearing and Infusion

So saying all of that, let’s see if there’s some stuff we can clear. You know I love to use the pendulum. This is the bobber: I am going to use the bobber to clear any place where you think that compassion equals companionship. Because I think it doesn’t.

There is the story of Kuan Yin. You may know about her. She’s the Asian Goddess of Compassion. She stands at the juncture between Earth and Heaven, and waits for all sentient beings to come to enter Heaven. She doesn’t get down into the muck of human life. She beckons people, through her enlightenment, to become enlightened. So if that doesn’t resonate with you, if that doesn’t seem right – and you would like that to change – that’s what this dowsing is for.

So again, this a bobber. You can also dowse with a pendulum. Here’s my little pendulum. And normally, people dowse for yes and no answers. But with my teacher, Raymon Grace ( I’ve learned that you can actually change energy.

We’re going to change any energy where you think you have to be in the muck with other people who are suffering, such that you don’t help them, but actually swim around in the muck and maybe drown together. We don’t want that. No, we want to be strong and sure and solid – so that, when people need our help and ask for our help, we are ready to give that.

Okay. So you may or may not feel anything with this. And I’m using the bobber just to show that the energy can shift, is shifting, and when it’s finished.

Now we’re infusing into you strength, compassion, and knowing when you can help, and knowing how to help, and knowing what’s your best path to being compassionate and helpful. Because everybody is different.

Yesterday, one of the participants – she’s a landscape architect – and so, she was giving the design and the implementation of a garden to a woman who’s just been diagnosed with cancer. And that’s her way of being helpful and giving.

Is there anything else that we could clear? Oh, how about this: How about a belief that you cannot be successful and kind? And you cannot have money and be kind? Well, anyway, we’ve seen mean people with a lot of money – and as I said, mean people without money. And they’re just kind of mean.

So let’s clear away anything that stands in the way of your believing that you can have money and be kind. Have money and success. So we’re going to just change that and infuse success, prosperity, and kindness into your belief system – if you want it. If you don’t want it, you don’t have to have it. But I think it’d be more helpful for you to be happy in your business, and be able to help those you want to help.

Here’s one more. And this one is really key, I think, for a lot of women. Because we think that we’re supposed to be on par with everyone, we’re all supposed to be equal. And it’s great to help raise others up. But you also need to raise yourself up.

Any place where you think that your success will hurt someone else, let’s just clear and delete that. I’ll give you the knowing that your success benefits others. Your success benefits others – by being a great example, by having the resources to share and help others, by shining your light and giving light to others. Okay. Good. Okay.

So I hope that felt helpful. I have a couple of more things I want to say to you. One is that, my idea is that, we’re all on a path of upward spirals of abundance. This is artwork done by my awesome branding person, Annie Franceschi of And this is her representation of us rising together: Upward Spirals of Abundance. And she made this pillow for me, which I'm just thrilled with.

And then, I have two quotes to leave you with. One is that someone shared yesterday in the Abundance with Adele workshop – which you can access by going to, under Events. The quote is, “Denying myself is not the same as giving.”

And this is from Gay Hendricks of his book The Big Leap. And I just love this: “I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same.”

So that’s it for today. I’ll see you next time. And if you have any responses to these ideas and the clearing work that we just did, I would love to hear from you. And thanks for being here.

In prosperity, I’ll see you next time.

PS    If you would like to attend a live Abundance with Adele workshop in the Research Triangle area of NC, register your free ticket at See you there!