The Hidden Belief That is Actively Blocking Your Wealth

Not too long ago, I was leading a workshop on abundance when someone asked a question that stopped the whole room.

“Adele, this is all great, wanting to grow, wanting to expand. But what about the people who are struggling? What about the ones who don’t have as much as I do?”

And I felt that question deep in my bones because I’ve asked it too. I’ve wrestled with it, sat with it, and thought long and hard about it as well.

If I succeed, does that mean I’m leaving others behind?

If I have more than enough, does that make me selfish?

So many of us, especially those who care deeply and lead with love, carry this guilt like a secret weight. And if this is something that has been jamming you up in calling more abundance into your life, take heart, because there’s a way through.

Drowning So Others Can Swim

Let’s start here:

How does your struggling help another person?

If you’re drowning, does it save someone else from going under?

If you’re exhausted, does it give someone else rest?

If you’re broke, does it lift someone else into wealth?

No!

I spent years as a therapist, sitting with people in their deepest pain. And I learned something vital: I could not help them by sinking into the muck with them.

If I let myself get lost in their pain, we both drowned. But if I stood steady, clear, and strong, I could throw them a lifeline.

The same is true with abundance.

When you are stable, when you have more than enough, when your cup is full, you have something to give.

You have the resources to lift others.

You have the bandwidth to be generous.

Because your scarcity doesn’t serve anyone. Your thriving and abundance does.

When the Student is Ready

Here’s another hard truth: You cannot force someone to grow.

You cannot make someone ready.

Every transformation you’ve ever had in your life, was it because someone else forced you? No.

Maybe they inspired you, maybe they nudged you, but you made the choice.

And the same is true for everyone else.

Some people are ready for help. Some are not. Some will take your advice, your resources, your opportunities, and still stay stuck.

Your job isn’t to force people to change. Your job is to stand in your abundance and help when others are ready to ask for help.

Mission-Driven Wealth Deployment

We can talk about energy, kindness, and compassion all day long, but at some point, manifesting abundance as material money helps.

Money funds women’s shelters.

Money builds hospital wings.

Money gets books into the hands of children, food onto the tables of families, and clean water into communities that don’t have it.

And yet, so many of us hesitate to receive more, as if having wealth somehow makes us less kind, less compassionate.

The truth is, abundance doesn’t make someone mean and it doesn’t make someone kind.

You are who you are, with or without abundance.

Having more money doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you a person with more options, more resources, more capacity to do what is already in your heart.

So if it is in your heart to do more good-hearted, mission-driven things, that can only help the world and the people in it.

It’s Not a Zero Sum Game

Somewhere along the way, many of us (especially women) were taught that if we succeed, if we shine, if we rise, someone else must fall.

That’s a lie.

Success is not a limited resource.

Your abundance doesn’t take away from anyone else.

In fact, your expansion creates space for others to rise too.

When you step into abundance, when you break generational cycles of scarcity, when you rewrite the story of what’s possible—you don’t just do it for yourself.

You do it for everyone watching.

Because someone out there is looking at you, waiting to see if this kind of success is possible for a person like them.

And when you do it, when you thrive, when you give generously without depletion—they’ll know it’s possible for them too.

Denying Yourself is Not Giving to Someone Else

Gay Hendricks, in The Big Leap, offers an affirmation I love:

“I expand in abundance, success, and love every day, as I inspire those around me to do the same.”

That’s the kind of energy I want to live in. That’s the kind of impact I want to have.

Because denying yourself isn’t the same as giving.

Playing small doesn’t make the world better.

And your struggle does not help someone else have more.

So step forward. Succeed boldly. Give freely.

Let your own light be the reason someone else dares to shine.